The lens of caring so deeply for our children sometimes helps us see how our best self might guide us too. We had a recent important milestone birthday in our family. Like most people, I’ve always cared how people felt on their birthday, and have been sensitive to that balance of the joy of anticipation and that of preparing not to be disappointed. As a parent, this can become an intense pressure (not to disappoint), and something that can become more difficult during the teen years.

On this birthday, as I watched this being whom I love so much, I was anxious that she would be disappointed. Instead, the gift I received was seeing her behave with such grace throughout the day, receiving and reacting with delight to all her presents and cards (big and small), and the kind words and wishes from family, near and far.

It became very clear to me that while I had thought that she might always be wanting more, instead she very clearly knew when she had enough. I realized that this was a lesson for me, an important part of living a good life, and a sustainable one.

Yes, while I can strive to do more, to learn more, to contribute more, to earn more; I should always be clear about what is enough. If we could do that, I think we would all have a lot more grace, and joy in our lives. And even as we dream big, we’ll be much better able to plan and prioritize what will create real value for ourselves, and the communities and the earth that we care for.